“We’re being led by an idiot with a crayon”


This was a prompt from someone and I thought you might enjoy it. After some of the early praise on a scratch idea, I am considering turning this into a kids story/series. ENJOY!!


“We’re being led by an idiot with a crayon,” shouted a dark haired child with sharp features.

“I’m not an idiot,” roared a white haired, muscular toddler who was waving his gold crayon wildly in the air.

The dark haired child stuck her tongue out and retorted, “Yes, you are, Zeus! You made Grandmother mad and she turned us into this!”

“It’s not my fault Hera,” thundered Zeus as he pointed his crayon at her.

“Yes it is,” another squeaky voice insisted. This one had a pale blue spork in his hand.

“Thank you Poseidon,” Hera replied imperiously.

“He was being mean again Hera. You don’t have to thank me for that,” Poseidon pouted while banging his spork on the ground.

Hera rolled her dark eyes and stomped away from her brothers as fat crocodile tears welled up in her eyes.

A blonde haired child ran up to Hera and gave her a blue and green sea shell necklace.

Hera arched a toddler sized eyebrow and snorted, “Really, Aphrodite. Sea shells?”

Aphrodite nodded her blonde head and sweetly replied, “Love will save the day, Hera. It always does.”

Hera frowned as her crocodile tears fell. “Tell that to the gold crayon waving bully.” Hurt was obvious in her high-pitched voice as she stomped her feet.

“He’s a boy Hera. He likes to pull your hair,” Aphrodite soothed.

“He picks on all girls,” Hera cried.

“That’s what boys do,” Aphrodite tried.

Hera hiccupped before crying, “Nu-Uh! Zeus was being mean again! That’s why Grandmother Gaia turned us into kids,” she finished wailing.

“You need a nap,” a bronze haired child said from behind Hera.

“Go away Athena,” Hera snapped as her crocodile tears dried on her cheeks.

Athena cocked an eyebrow and calmly stated, “You are throwing a tantrum because of an idiot waving a gold crayon.

“Wisdom dictates you need a nap,” she finished calmly.

From across the room Zeus screamed, “I’m not an idiot!”

Hera rolled her eyes before snapping, “Nobody likes a know-it-all.”

“You’re losing your temper, another point in my favor,” Athena reasoned.

Seeing Hera’s dark features begin to cloud over in anger, Aphrodite cut in whimsically, “No one has to get mad. If we rest, surely Morpheus will guard our dreams.

“Who knows, when we wake we might be big again and then I could wear a pretty dress and sparkly sandals.”

Athena shook her head at Athena’s nonsense as she walked away to a far corner.

Hera looked at Aphrodite in shock. “Do you ever think of anything besides what to wear?”

Aphrodite smiled brightly and said, “I’ve been turned into a three-year-old. It wouldn’t be right to think about going on a date with Ares would it?”

Hera rolled her dark eyes before stomping away with the sea shell necklace she had been given. Without warning Hera screamed at the top of her lungs, “This is STUPID!” Her high-pitched shriek had the boys in the room covering their ears.

As Hera started to stomp her feet she heard a huff behind her and a wet tongue licked the back of her neck. As her shrieks of disgust filled the room, Hera turned to find herself facing a three headed dog.

“Gross! Hades tell your dogs to leave me alone,” Hera commanded.

Hades black eyes glowed the color of sulfur before he replied, “No can do. Xerxes is a boy dog and when girls are upset he gives them kisses. It’s his way of making you feel better,” Hades finished with a pale smile.

Hera scowled at this, as Xerxes gave her one more body sized doggy kiss that left Hera covered in slobber. The smile on Xerxes’ face was unmistakable as he continued to watch over his youthful charges – sometimes it was good to be the pet of the God of the Dead.


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