What is Family?

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Family. It comes in all forms, shapes, and sizes. Many people claim to have it. They even claim to know what it is. Some people don’t even like the family they have. But what is a family, exactly? Is it blood? Paper? Or something entirely more?

If you think family is blood, that that means you have to love someone because they are related to you through genetics. But there are thousands of people who can’t stand the people that they are connected to by genetics. There are even those who have been disowned by blood.

What about paper? I hate to break it to you, but that piece of paper means nothing if you don’t value the signature that you scrawled in a fit of passion.

That brings us to something a bit more nebulous. Bonds. Ties that bind. Experience. Life.

It is known that when you go through life with a person or group of people by your side they become closer to you. You could have a best friend that has been by your side through near-death experiences and heartaches galore. That relationship could be platonic or not. Your choice would then be to decide if that person was family.

The person obviously means something to you. Are they still a friend or are they more.

For instance, if you are in a long-term relationship with your significant other are they family. How would you expect your siblings and parents to treat them? Your significant other means something to you whether other people you know like it or not. Would you have your parents and siblings treat your significant other like family even though you don’t have a piece of paper and blood ties?

What I am trying to say is family is a nebulous concept that is completely bereft of little things like paper and blood. Family is what you make it and where you take it.

The next time someone tells you that you aren’t family because you don’t share their blood or have a piece of paper welcoming you to them, just smile and say ‘I mean something regardless. They chose to make me family. I have chosen them as my family. That means more than your societal concepts.’

Fall From Grace – Chapter 9

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I have been working slowly but surely on Fall From Grace. The amount of research that I have already put into this is staggering – and to think, I’m still not done. One thing I have found is a new sympathy for the Puritans.

Other things I have noticed are the severe inaccuracies that we are taught in school. There are quite a few of those. A fascinating fact is that  the colonies were known as the land that spawned grandparents. Less industry in the so-called new world meant people could live longer and for the first time, parents were seeing their grandchildren being born.

Another fact is that contrary to popular belief, Puritans married for love. The median male age for marriage was 26, while the females tended to marry at 23.

Before I continue on the amazing and wondrous facts that I have learned, I give you Chapter 9 in Fall From Grace.

As always feel free to share your thoughts and Happy Reading!

The three prisoners stayed up well into the night as there was no way for them to get comfortable. The full moon lit up the little cell illuminating the haggard looking prisoners.

Though thunder rolled through the sky promising to let loose a downpour that could flood the crops – and their cell, there wasn’t a cloud in sight.

“What happened to Mrs. Good,” Grace whispered.

“She was sent to Ipswich Jail on account of her being with child. They’ll probably try to charge her newborn with witchcraft as well. Lord above knows that they charged her four-year-old with it,” Mrs. Osbourne bitterly informed.

Grace sighed and managed to look angry rather humiliated. With her neck bent, the moonlight made the lice in her hair sparkle and crawl at the same time. “They’re charging children,” Grace exclaimed in horror.

“That has been our way since the beginning. You know well how children are expected to act, Grace,” Mrs. Osbourne sternly reminded.

“I realize they are held to adult standards but, at four a child’s mind is filled with whimsy and imagination. Young Dorothy Good wouldn’t be able to speak intelligently enough to answer the interrogators,” Grace confirmed with muffled tones.

“What they’re doing’s not right, Miss Grace. They even sent Miss Dorothy to Ipswich with her mother,” Tituba whispered.

“Why do they have the right to hold a child in shackles,” Grace asked plaintively.

“Those are the rules. Besides, she claimed that a snake spoke to her,” Mrs. Osbourne insisted.

“Rules or not, they aren’t right. A talking snake is nothing more than her own imagination. There aren’t many ways for a girl to occupy her time. It’s not like we could go out and learn a trade,” Grace insisted with her bent head.

“We shouldn’t be here accused of crimes that weren’t committed, Grace,” Mrs. Osbourne stated to a flash of lightning and roll of thunder.

Rain poured from the sky in bucket loads obscuring the once bright moon. The fire in the hearth across on the other side of the jail did nothing to warm the cell as rain leaked through the window above them.

***

The mid-day sun was turning the cell into a sauna. Bodily waste baked in the scorching heat of the sun. Water from last night’s down pour had long since evaporated. An incessant clanking of metal on metal reverberated around the room.

It wasn’t long before long the clanking stopped and the women gave a sigh of relief as their shoulders sagged. Their semi-relaxed air was not to last as stomping feet made their way closer to the cell.

The women gazed at the cell bars from the floor. Tattered and stained clothes only enhanced the bruises and lacerations that adorned their faces. A short, thin man stopped in front of the cell. The thick blue haze of tobacco smoke that surrounded the man smelt vaguely nutty.

His leather boots were worn in such a way to blend in with the drab wooden floor. He was bald except for a white ring of hair around the base of his skull. He looked upon the prisoners with enough disgust to wither a crop field. He shook his head and sharply stated,

“I hadn’t thought to believe that the daughter of a baker would stoop so low as to sell her soul to the devil’s fiery furnace.”

Grace tried to look up to glare at the man only to find herself staring at her soiled skirt. “I will tell you like I have told the interrogators, Grandfather. I am no witch; nor would God allow me to sign the Devil’s Book,” Grace snapped.

“I told your mother she was marrying the wrong man. She was of age and wouldn’t listen to me though. She could have had a wealthier suitor and more comfortable life, but she chose your father. Now look what she has to deal with. A daughter that would dare go against all that is holy,” Grandfather spat.

“At least she has love. Unlike you she didn’t dishonor herself and God,” Grace venomously spat back.

“Instead, she gets a daughter whose neck won’t bend from stubborn pride,” he shot back.

“I am not guilty of turning my back to God. If my faith costs me my life, than so be it; but I’ll not confess to something that I didn’t do,” Grace forcefully stated.

“And break your mother’s heart while your at it, no doubt,” Grandfather sneered.

“Man breaks my mother’s heart for bearing false witness,” Grace snapped from her bound position.

“You are naught to my family. The next time I will see you is the day you swing on Gallows Hill for your treachery,” Grandfather fumed as he stormed away from the cell.
Grace took a calming breath as her grandfather arrogantly strode away from the cell and implored, “Pardon the disgraceful scene, ladies; unfortunately, grandfather has always been a bitter man.”

“I’m no lady Miss Grace, but to me that sounds like ones dirty laundry blowing in the breeze – and were always taught that God frowns on that,” Tituba said dismissing Grace’s apology.

“Bah, child. No need to apologize for someone else,” Mrs. Osbourne firmly informed as she began to cough.

Tituba tried to reach around Grace to comfort Mrs. Osbourne as hacking coughs racked her body. The only comfort that she could give was to hold the older woman’s hand.

Time For A Rant

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What Adults Want

That is the question that we all want answered. As adults we want the same thing that we wanted as children and teenagers. Friendship, respect, and understanding. If we have those things, we can grow into well adjusted people.

In order to have any of this though, we must find the qualities in ourselves. We must be a friend to ourself, respect our own person, and understand who we are. The last one can sometimes be the most difficult. For everyone on the planet understanding of who we are as a person is a lifelong journey; with a new portion revealed everyday.

Being our own personal friend is just as difficult. Daily we hear people putting us down and telling us that we won’t be anyone. Would you let someone talk that way to you? No. Therefor why do you talk that way to yourself? How can you grow to be well adjusted if you constantly put yourself down. Being a friend to yourself is the first way to attract true friends.

Now we come to the trickiest one. Respecting yourself. First realize that the rest of the world won’t treat you the way you deserve to be treated. This is why you must treat yourself the right way. If it doesn’t feel right to you, don’t do it. If something makes you uncomfortable, don’t do it. These are the first steps to respecting yourself. If you don’t want someone else to treat you a certain way, don’t treat yourself that way.